REALLY, REALLY Fucked Up Dream

I'm at school wich has been mysteriously relocated to Canton from Waltham and I'm wearing a halter top, short and sandals. I don't wear haltertops. It's hot outside, and I enter a big elementary school. I find my class and there aren't enough computers for everyone so I have to share with someone. I had a hissyfit because "I'm not aying all this money to share equipment!"

I noticed Sarah wasn't there... maybe she got lost? The class ends halfway through an excersise and an overdressed, overperfumed, over make-upped woman comes in and locks the door and proceeds to try and sell us cosmetics. There is a guy in the room I don't recognize and he is frantically looking for the door. In the dream my hand hurts and theres no bandage. The incision starts to peel back and reveal layer after layer of new skin.

The stinky woman goes away and it's time to go home. While in class it snowed about 5 feet. I am not dressed for snow. The main entrance of the school has also disappeared so we all shuffle out towards the back of the building. I am at the foot of a flight of stairs covered in green shag carpet when Ron finds me. He is carrying golf clubs. Neither of us golf. I tell him to go put those in the car and come back for me.

I try to go up the stairs and pictures of angry bulldogs magically appear going all the way up them. A crazy old fat man in a tuxedo appears holding something that is squirming that I don't recognize and sucking a lollipop. He has a mustache. He says I have to speak nicely to the doggies or they won't let me pass. I say nice doggy, pretty doggy, etc to every dog picture on the stairs and the pictures of angry dogs fall asleep as I pass. I notice a little boy has followed me up. He is wearing a tuxedo as well and blue and yellow nail polish.

At the top of the stairs he instructs me to "step on the lilly pads" and I look down and there are lily pads on the green shag carpet. They lead to a door. I hop and hop to each pad. The last pad is a dog. A real dog this time. The dog looks up at me and says "Whatever" and goes to sleep.

I open the door into a 70's era kitchen/family room with more hideous carpeting. I see a door out into the snow and I say "that's it! I'm outta here!" The little boy follows me and turns into a mean looking man child in a boys body. He tells me to be careful and to watch out for the bicycles. I look up and floating magically in the snow are a herd of feral bicycles growling at me.

Then I woke up.